Loving Kindness, Soul
Requited Love – a love “poem”
If you see a rose, do you greet it? If you see the sun rise, do you notice? Love is a contradiction. it is space, and closeness. it is sharing, and being separate. it is passion, and realism. it is romantic, and platonic. it is companionship. partnership. All the while recognizing each moment’s fluidity. Love is dependable and unpredictable. it is strong, and fragile. it is gendered, and androgynous. it has divine timing, and comes and the wrong moment. it heals, and it harms. Sees the light, and the shadow. Love is pride and adoration. it is honest and unconditional. it is is patient, willing to wait, and willing to be disappointed. it cares for you when you’re sick. it makes you laugh, and cry. Challenges, and it supports. Love is not codependency, projections, delusion, or infatuation. Love does not expect. Love does not judge. Love is deep connection to Self and beyond. Even when blessed with love we are tempted hold out for something greater. an ideal. a form. a half to a whole. a silence to the questions and contradictions. a balance. Resist temptation. We have love. We are loved. But only with open eyes and minds free of fear. If you see a rose, do you greet it? If you see the sun rise, do you notice?
2 Comments
brad jones
bravo. Your piece evoked an examination of my loves. Perhaps the longest-lasting one after my divorce was an unbalanced one. I loved her with all of my heart, with every fiber of my being. After my LVAD implant surgery, she pulled away, ultimately I believe fell out of love with me because I was struggling emotionally with the dramatic changes in my physical topography and my emotional balance, given the gross divergence between what I was told it would do, and the real outcome/aftermath.
I had committed to a lifetime with her as she had with me. She chose not to want to hear of my struggle nor would she share hers. What I believe could have been a powerful bonding experience was anything but. She told me that no one had ever loved her as much as I did. Ours was the best physical relationship she had ever before enjoyed. Yet that wasn’t enough. I wasn’t enough somehow
She hated what this heart assist pump had done to me, she cried out. I wondered, what, like kept me alive? So yes love is unpredictable, often unfair or one-sided. It also is so beautiful in the intimacy of two souls incarnate.
This was by far the harshest lesson about love I have ever learned. I continue my quest for my one true, trusted, devoted love. It’s been a long time since I have held a woman I loved in my arms. I hold out hope eternal that she is out there, looking for me.
Love is worth fighting for, worth waiting for, worth all the lonely days, months, even years until it comes along, in all its flawed perfection.
thank you Jenna b for writing this provocative poem. I love your writing, your insights and your apparent facility expressing it all.
brad jones
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